Knockers

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While checking twitter, I noticed RedNeckMommy spoke of her jugs (just like she does every day). Jugs - a term I have not heard in years.

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I always used knockers, another term I have not used in years. High School - We were on a cigarette break hiding behind the football field in the woods. A guy was telling me my girlfriend had a nice set of knockers. I wondered what he meant - knockers - it was the first time I heard the word. I had no idea what he was talking about but I agreed. Conferring with my best friend he discretely asked his older brother - our source for many answers to the mysteries of life.

I asked my gf on our daily walk home how she felt about someone calling her breasts knockers. She wondered who (I was pretty naive) and I told her. My gf was not afraid of anything. The next day during our morning hide/seek game cigarette break she asked him why he thought she had a nice set of knockers. He stuttered and never really gave her an answer but he did ask to see them which upset me.

After she left he threatened to kick my ass. I guess he was embarrassed. Our senior year I wrestled him during practice - he was two weight classes above me - I pinned him in thirty seconds the first time. It took almost a minute the second time. Guess I was pissed he had talked about my gf's knockers and had asked to see them.

I got to play with touch my gf's knockers that night after someone told her the story (my best friend called at my insistence) but I got slapped when I told her she had nice knockers. From them on I called them tits - she liked that and I liked them. WOW did I like them.

Knockers - hmmmm - who started using this word for tits or for that matter jugs. Jugs were those things grandpa sent me to the bar to fill with beer or the earthen colored jugs of clear liquid with no smell that we got from a guy living deep in the woods by the river.


I started my search with Google (as usual). First up in the results was:

Heidi Klum's Knockers (This was sort of funny - at 4 am)

And from Answers.com: Meaning #3: either of two soft fleshy milk-secreting glandular organs on the chest of a woman
with synonyms: breast, bosom, boob, tit, titty.

I was on the right path to success.

Then from Wikipedia http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Knockers

Knocker and knockers may refer to:

• Door knocker
• Knocker (folklore)
• Knocker (radio series)
• Female breasts

Ah, the Internet - all of these questions in my life and I have a place to get them answered without being ridiculed or labeled as a weirdo - yeah right!

I could not find the origin of knockers or jugs/juggs used as a vulgar reference to the female breasts.

Here are some of the other references I did see:

Knitted Knockers Benefit Breast Cancer Patients
Breasts Tits Juggs Funbags Hooters Knockers - SPIKE
Vigorous Exercise Cuts Breast Cancer Risk ('Bounce your boobies ...
The American Cancer Society

I had forgot (I wonder why, thinking of all those knockers I had known) about the use of knock as: she got knocked up; they were knocking boots in the back seat; he knocked the new policy; he knocked off the snitch; she told her son to knock it off; he was knocked cold; etc.

So I'm not sure who first used the word knockers to describe a woman's jugs. I just hope Redneckmommy and others keep flashing them.

I do write - just not feeling well

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I have not felt well the last few days - some kind of virus I think. Everyone I know seems to be experiencing the same symptoms. Maybe it is weather related - can't remember when I last saw the sun - only been a few days but yet a few too many.

Dreaming good though - maybe I can remember some of them and get them posted for posterity.

Weird Wednesday #29 (My 1st)

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My Blog List

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I follow over thirty blogs - using google reader. Luckily they don't all post daily.
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I just put up the last four or five I looked at lately. I'll add more as they are updated.

Don't try to 'guess' my tastes as many of the blogs I follow are for laughs - if they turn too serious I might abandon that single post - I'm too old to take too much seriously.

In fact about the only thing I take seriously is the HTML on the blogs I watch over. That and my grand-kids when they are trying to talk to me - I can't understand a darn thing they say.

The First Post

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I decided to setup this blog so that I have somewhere to post the shit crap I write. There is more to this post - can you figure out how to read the rest?
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And here is the rest of the post.

I hate giant posts appearing with no way to easily get to the bottom so I found this cute little Javascript that makes it easy. The whole post is still downloaded - you just don't have to look at it until you are ready.

I spent several days looking for a three column layout for blogspot. I spent about three hours wondering why I could not see the third column on the right of the blog.

That column should have been showing the Blog Archive but it was not there.

I went into the html and looked around but didn't see anything out of place. I added a few tweaks like white background for the posts to that these tired old eyes can see them. I did this and that but the blog archive would not fucking freaking appear.

I downloaded the html layout and chose a simple Google provided layout. I noticed the fucking freaking archive still was not showing. I figured Blogspot must be broken so ignored is and starting working on the little hide script.

I noticed that the blog archive was showing! What the hell was going on? I uploaded my three column layout and I was damned - the blog archive was not showing. Fuck Screw it I thought and worked on adding the hide script.

When I tested it the fucking freaking Blog Archive appeared. I was baffled then my head came out of my ass its foggy place and it dawned on me.

To have a Blog Archive you need posts. Right? I knew that.

Yeap, I was looking for a blog archive when I didn't have any posts.

So if you find that comical or interesting - stick around - this is the story of my life.

Later - don't forget - say what you mean not what you 'think'.